Herzblatt stories with Meghan and Harry, Arnold Schwarzenegger and Gwyneth Paltrow

Wis there actually anything new from Meghan and Harry? Oh, a lot. They move to New York, knows “Bild”: “They hope to be able to move more freely there. In addition, a flight from there to Harry’s home England would be shorter. ”They go“ back to England ”, announces“ Echo der Frau ”because their son Archie is“ seriously ill ”(“ Echo der Frau ”diagnosed: Archie squinted). Meghan was like “The New Leaf” assured, “already with the divorce lawyer”. And, as “Gala” reports, she experiences the “summer of her life” with Harry and plans a film with Brad Pitt. A lot going on, you can say.

Jörg Thomann

Editor in the “Life” section of the Frankfurter Allgemeine Sonntagszeitung.

Perfect, must admit “Gala”, but it still doesn’t work for the two. For example, at their nonprofit organization Archewell, named after their own son, which is only due to start next year: “It has just become known that there are problems with the approval of the trademark – the purpose of the organization still seems too vague to the US Patent Office.” vague? We can help here: Archewell is supposed to be an organization that does something good and regularly gives its founders the opportunity to shine on pretty photos in order to maintain their market value and thus to finance their not quite uncomplicated life. Concrete enough?

He is his biggest fan

After all, the network is making good progress: “As” Gala “learns from an insider from the film business, Meghan has found another, very personal way of making new contacts: she calls.” Donnerwetter, she is really with everyone Washed water. In a second step, she may even get a phone book.

Maintains his image: Arnold Schwarzenegger

Arnold Schwarzenegger maintains another method of preserving his image. “He is his biggest fan,” writes “Echo der Frau” and prints a photo on which Schwarzenegger cycles through Los Angeles and wears a T-shirt that shows him – in much younger, somewhat more muscular years. A quick research on the net shows that Schwarzenegger does this regularly, in changing T-shirts: he must have a whole collection of Arnie fan shirts. A winking bow before his own career, but also a bit tricky, he invites you to compare before and after. That is precisely why we are now considering whether we should also print a youth picture on a T-shirt – to prove that we actually had hair once, even for a long time. Also attractive would be a collection for long-term spouses who could demonstrate to the world with an old portrait of each other: he or she used to look not so bad in the past.

Noise with Bettina Wulff and her boyfriend

Another present recommends “Bunte” to us. “When was the last time you said ‘thank you’ from the bottom of your heart?”, She asks us: “It is often difficult to find the right words of thanks. But now you can let a ring speak for itself: the “Thank you for” ring from Wellendorff “, which represents a” thank you for eternity “. A proud page with five photos is dedicated to this ring by “Bunte”, which has the limp sum of “approx. Costs € 12,600; thanks should be well dosed. Especially since there is still cultivation material: “Delicate stackable rings with meaning – specify these rings for what you thank them (from € 4999).” If things were fair, Wellendorff would have to use at least one such stacking ring at “Bunte” for the beautiful reporting thank you.

Needs good nerves: Bettina Wulff

An actress has a completely different range of products on offer. “The candle, which is said to smell like her vagina, was sold out at lightning speed,” writes “Gala”. “Now Gwyneth Paltrow, 47, is presenting her new creation with, That smells like my orgasm ‘label.” Especially for men in permanent relationships there is some not irrelevant information: If what is being discussed here is actually one If there is a smell, it should be easy to recognize if it is only faked. Tasteless? Possibly. Maybe not as tasteless as the new ice cream from Ben & Jerry’s called “Netflix & Chilll’d”. What does such a Netflix ice cream taste like: after insomnia and poorly ventilated living room? And when does the “Kilofrust & guilty conscience” flavor come?

Franz Josef Wagner, who sings a song in praise of the police in “Bild”, does not suffer from insomnia: “For me, a police officer is a guard. I sleep well when he takes care of me. ”We wonder when exactly a policeman was watching Wagner at night: in the sobering up cell? “I have a good night when I hear a police siren,” he continues. Does he sleep just as well with fire brigade sirens when the water splashes and the aerial ladder is extended?

Finally, we want to turn to the magazine “Die Aktuell”, which we have scolded often enough for its maliciously twisted stories. Now she prints the headline: “Giant noise with Bettina Wulff and her new one!” And lo and behold: This time every word is correct. During the Corona period, Wulffs Neuer, a music teacher, had to move his drum lessons to his own home.

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