Friday, 18 Jan 2019

Miss Manners: Next time, treat a contagious employee with compassion

Dear Miss Manners, While traveling, my husband and I decided to stop for the night. I called a big chain hotel at an average price. While speaking, the clerk asked to put me on hold. It was long, but I thought she had to wait for someone at the counter.

A few minutes later, we arrived at the hotel. The same woman was at the reception. In the middle of our discussion, she apologized and went to the back. It was still a very long wait, and when she finally came out, I asked if anything was wrong.

"I'm sick," she says. I asked her if she wanted to tell her belly. C & # 39; was. I asked if it was contagious and she replied: "I hope not." I was horrified and I pulled out of the counter saying that I did not want to get sick. She said that she understood and that she would ask her manager to wait for me, then went back to the back. I waited and waited and nobody came out. I guess she was still vomiting.

I told my husband that I just wanted to leave. He was very upset with me, but we left. He said that I was terribly rude and that I had embarrassed him by my physical reaction.

My main concern was not to catch what she had. In addition to standing right in front of her, she would have manipulated my credit card, the room keys, the pen and the papers I would be handling too.

Was I rude? I just did not want to get sick. If not, how should I have handled the situation?

With at least a semblance of anxiety for the person who is really sick, before becoming consumed with the distant probability of your own illness.

Dear Miss Manners, What does "elegant shades of white" mean for a bridal outfit?

That the bride is very unusual combination of dictatorial, yet willing to be downgraded.

Dear Miss Manners, If a gift is given, is it still appropriate for the donor to tell the recipient that the gift has given him more time and effort than he might need to look at? ("Believe it or not, it took the whole day to find the one that suits you.")

On the one hand, since it's the thought that counts, the recipient may want to know the amount of thought ("That was very nice of you!"). On the other hand, such revelations can tarnish the gift and prove to be like a conch fishery.

Even if there is a direct request ("How long did it take to prepare it?"), Is it allowed to answer directly or the deviation ("Oh, that was not a problem, really ") the preferred answer?

"Oh, I had so much fun find / order / cut this gift for you. I hope you will enjoy it. If more details are requested, Miss Manners will allow you to deliver modestly. Indulge yourself, not luxurious.

The new columns of Miss Manners are posted from Monday to Saturday on You can send questions to Miss Manners on her website,

2018, by Judith Martin


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