Rabbi Laura Geller, who became the Reform movement’s third woman rabbi 50 years ago and made history in 1994 as the first woman rabbi to lead a major metropolitan synagogue at Temple Emanuel of Beverly Hills, told The Journal about facing seminary abuse, cultural barriers, and the evolving role of ritual in Jewish life.
Early Lessons in Ritual and Generational Silence
According to Rabbi Geller, a lifelong perspective on Jewish ritual began with a childhood memory from when she was a 13-year-old girl in a Boston suburb. After telling her mother she had just gotten her period, her mother replied that her own mother had slapped her upon reaching menarche. When young Laura biked to her grandmother’s house to ask why, her grandmother explained in a strong Yiddish accent that her mother was losing blood, looked pale, and needed color in her cheeks. Reflecting on that history years later as a 23-year-old student at Hebrew Union College (HUC), Rabbi Geller realized the complex messaging embedded in such traditions. As she stated in the source material, ritual matters, noting that the generational slap carried a mixed message of familial connection alongside warnings regarding sexuality and pregnancy. Later in life, through her work with older individuals, she observed how rituals that seemed unimportant during youth take on a powerful role in creating order and connection in an unpredictable world.
Seminary Challenges and Institutional Regrets
During her studies in the mid-1970s—splitting time between HUC in New York and Los Angeles before HUC ordained people in Los Angeles—Rabbi Geller navigated a predominantly male environment. As the lone female in her class, she studied under Prof. Stephen Passamaneck, whom she described as extremely abusive by intentionally assigning pieces of text that were most embarrassing for her to read aloud. One morning during a class discussion on circumcision, she left the classroom crying and resolved to quit before a male classmate intervened and told her not to let the professor ruin her career. She did not report the behavior at the time because the professor was tenured and carried a gun. Thirty years later, Rabbi Sarah Bassin, who later became the associate rabbi at Temple Emanuel, faced similar abuse from the same professor during an independent study, leading her to report him to the dean. Professor Passamaneck left the college two years later after multiple women came forward with comparable experiences. Rabbi Geller expressed her primary career regret as not having the courage and clarity to push back earlier so that others could have been spared suffering, while praising Hebrew Union College for later initiating a thoughtful process of teshuvah and acknowledgment.
Feminist Perspectives on Sacred Texts
Encountering traditional texts through a feminist lens revealed deep pain, even when ancient rabbis attempted to mitigate harsh laws. Rabbi Geller pointed to biblical passages such as the trial of an accused woman forced to drink dirty water—where vomiting served as proof of innocence and prevented her husband from divorcing her—which likely functioned as a protection in an era when men could divorce wives for any reason. In another instance, she recalled a discussion regarding the bride price for a child who had been violated, where male classmates remained unbothered while she sat horrified, noting she was the only one in the room who had once been a two-year-old girl. According to Rabbi Geller, reading these traditions changes as more women join faculties and feminist men teach, allowing individuals to bring their own life stories to the texts.
Aligning Feminism, Judaism, and Later-Life Rituals
In the late 1970s, when only a handful of women rabbis existed, Rabbi Geller coordinated with Betty Friedan ahead of a Central Conference of American Rabbis convention in Arizona, a non-ERA state. Facing a dilemma over whether to attend, Rabbi Geller contacted Friedan, who advised them to go and invite her to speak. The resulting speech marked the first time Friedan connected her feminism to her Judaism, sparking broader conversations about women’s leadership despite ongoing criticisms regarding voice volume and attire. Building on a lifetime of breaking barriers, Rabbi Geller explores the spiritual dimensions of aging in her second book, Moments That Matter. At 78 years old, she emphasizes the importance of creating new rituals to mark later-life milestones, such as retirement, celebrating 40-year partnerships, or meeting new romantic partners later in life.
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