A daughter’s 18th birthday is prompting a reflection on the often-uneven distribution of caregiving responsibilities within families, and in society at large.
The Weight of Unpaid Care
An oncologist shares her observations from both her medical practice and personal life, noting a pattern where women disproportionately shoulder the burden of caring for aging parents and other family members. This imbalance is highlighted by the fact that women provide 2.2 billion hours of informal care annually, valued at $77.9 billion.
The author’s experience in geriatric oncology reveals that, while spouses are often present for appointments, when it comes to additional support, it is “almost always a woman” – a daughter, daughter-in-law, or female friend – who steps in to assist.
The Cycle Continues
This pattern is playing out in the author’s own family as her daughter approaches adulthood. Recognizing her daughter’s tendency to readily take on caring roles, she is actively encouraging her sons to share equally in household tasks and the responsibility of caring for their grandparents, and eventually, their parents.
The author hopes that by the time her daughter is driving her, society will have moved beyond gender stereotypes that equate caregiving with “women’s work.”
Frequently Asked Questions
What does the author observe in her geriatric oncology clinic?
The author observes that when patients are accompanied to appointments by someone other than a spouse, it is almost always a woman – a daughter, daughter-in-law, niece, or female friend.
What is the economic value of unpaid care provided by women?
Women provide a collective 2.2 billion hours of informal care each year, valued at $77.9 billion.
What is the author’s hope for her daughter?
The author hopes her daughter will live in a society that has reconsidered gender stereotypes and that she will be asked to drive because she is available, not because it is considered “women’s work.”
What steps can families take to ensure caregiving responsibilities are shared more equitably?
