Kristi and Siim Kallas, 52 years of love
Siim, what do you particularly like about Kristi?
Kristi was a very beautiful girl. This is a very important fact…she still is today, but then she was young and beautiful, now she is simply beautiful. But the main thing is her character: good-natured, understanding, caring towards all people. He likes to laugh, humor. We openly discussed with him everything we need.
In your experience, what is the biggest challenge in marriage?
Sim: Bearing and raising children. It’s like an eternal process. In the sense that at the beginning you have to hold on, then see that your children get on the right path.
Kristi: At the same time, you can’t tell children to go to that school, etc., but they have to make their own choices. It is necessary to raise them in such a way that they can choose for themselves. This is very important.
Sim: The whole family is important; if you get married and think it’s forever, a person’s life isn’t forever – but children and grandchildren come along and everything moves on, doesn’t it?
Kristi: We have always tried to spend holidays with children. There was always an excursion somewhere, on the Black Sea or elsewhere, we went to Lithuania and Saaremaa. After all, we worked, I was often on call as a doctor, and Siim was almost always some kind of manager, some kind of boss, but we always tried to find a way to be with the children at least during the holidays.
Sim: It was a very important principle and the children really appreciated it because every summer it was like this.
Do you have any dreams that you would absolutely like to realize together?
Sim: Hold on as long as you can.
Kristi: We have been able to travel so much during our life that we no longer feel like traveling, but we thought that suddenly in September this year we would go to Cannes – this sandy beach and such nice restaurants… In Estonia, we will look all previews. It’s always good.
Sim: I just bought tickets for the concert.
Kristi: Large symphony orchestras are especially fantastic. We’re not musical people, but we’re so immersed in music that we really like it.
And also a reason to leave the house?
Kristi: Anyway, cheer yourself up a little and dress well. Go, have some cognac with your friends too.
Sim: This is very important.
Kristi: Yes, it is very important that you see your friends there. We are both already 75 years old.
How do you show that you care for each other?
Kristi: For example, Siim loves to give me flowers, which I really like. For me, giving flowers is special. I don’t know what I’m doing… I’m cooking good food and making it happy through my stomach. I used to bake a lot, but now … We had a tradition that on September 1, my mother always baked some kind of pie with apples.
Sim: Breakfast is very important. Some get a sandwich… We also don’t eat any kind of hotel breakfast with three meals in a row, but a proper breakfast – it’s just very important for some reason.
Kristi: Every family must have a real dining table, where they can eat sitting indoors. We don’t do anything special, but you sit at the table and don’t run anywhere. If it’s a work week, we also get up early enough so we don’t have to hastily eat breakfast.
Can you talk to each other about everything or are there topics you’d rather not talk about?
Kristi: There are no taboo topics.
Sim: Even if there are business negotiations that I hold alone. There is no secret, but there are simply topics that are not important at home.
Kristi: We can always talk about whatever we need.
Sim: But if you understand that your partner doesn’t want to talk about something, then you don’t have to talk about it. At least not at this point.
What would you say to young couples starting a life together to make it long and fulfilling? What should you keep in mind?
Kristi: It should be borne in mind that there are still common interests. For example, a sport, reading books or anything to talk about. And you have to consider the other person’s wishes too. And trust him.
Sim: Don’t be rude. In my opinion, a very important thing is that you cannot fill your life by berating yourself for small things. One has an opinion, the other has another opinion, but that’s not why we have to argue about certain things.
Kristi: Nothing good comes from wanting to re-educate a partner.
Sim: Nowadays, it’s often a problem when one is successful and the other isn’t. It doesn’t matter who has the most important job. We have never had this difference.
Kristi: I still managed to fully realize myself as a doctor, I worked for 35 years. But young people could also be told that it is important for a woman to receive attention from her husband. They may be small things, but they show that the person is thinking of you. He not only does everything for himself, but he also takes care of you. It is a feeling; love as such is not a word, but love is a series of actions. Of course, it’s nice when they sometimes say they love.
Eda and Urmas Veeroja, 40 years of love
What makes a man happy in marriage?
Urmas: What makes you happy is when you are understood and when you are not scolded.
Do you think this is one of the reasons men are starting to look outside the home, so to speak?
Urmas: I don’t know, but the key word would definitely be yes if I were to be attacked. There are two purposes here, one is that you yourself constantly give the reasons and then you have to look in the mirror yourself. But the second is that there is no point in making a drama out of every little thing. There’s no point in getting excited.
Eda, what kind of man is Urma?
And from: My first impression of Urmas was that he was active and sporty, and that was important to me then – and still is today. I don’t like men who sit like bags in a corner. Urmas is always in action, I like this activity and mobility, an active attitude towards anything. He was tempting in the beginning and he still is. The spontaneity of him, and I always respected the wisdom of him, because stupid people or when thinking is very slow and leads nowhere… I absolutely can’t relate to people like that.
What makes a woman happy?
And from: Well, that’s what makes a woman happy, if life isn’t boring.
That life with this man is interesting?
And from: Yes, life with this man is interesting. We know many men who are unwilling to go anywhere or do anything.
And from: No, the fact that it comes is one thing, but I mean it initiates some actions, behaviors and being. Sometime I wouldn’t want such a life where I have to organize everything myself. I am not his mother nor the station manager married here. This is very important!
Partnership and sharing are very interesting, sometimes this way and sometimes that way. And what’s really important is that whatever thoughts come to mind, you have the courage to talk about them. I know many people who can’t say what they really think or feel at all. We talk about almost everything.
How much do you flirt with each other?
Urmas: Maybe a little less now. We have been living for a few years and have seen this world and have developed some habits.
And from: You use the word “flirting” and there’s no direct connection, but we touch and glance at each other in passing. We can’t walk around in this country as dirty or black, the other person will notice right away, all the time there is literally some kind of pushing and joking.
Urmas: It’s necessary to joke, but neither of us is malicious about it.
And from: It’s not that you don’t notice the other person, you keep noticing them and then taking them. Even physical contact.
Urmas, how do you say you notice your wife?
And from: Just take this morning, you came, put your hands on your ass, then put your hands on your tits. All the strategic places were visited beautifully in the morning.
Urmas: Let’s say a hug and a feeling.
But how often do you talk about love? Urmas, how often do you tell Eda that you love her?
Urmas: Listen, it still happens sometimes. It’s not like I have to say it twice or do it three times today. It’s more like the day is over and we can relax for a while and you say it was very nice.
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2023-12-09 08:24:13
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